My girlfriend had some headshots done a while ago and just got them back from the photographer. She’s putting them up everywhere and asking her friends for input on which ones are the best. She’s an actress, and the point of this process is to choose a select few photos to represent her when her headshots are sent to casting, depending on the role she is auditioning for.
Ceci has been doing some off-off Broadway things, and has acted in a bunch of student films and a few shorts that her friends have made. She’s working very hard to get herself to the next level in the acting world, and I couldn’t be more proud of her.
The photos are accumulating likes and comments, especially a few certain ones that have specific looks to them. It’s really amping her up, and that is refreshing for me to see.
Dating an actress can be a process. She has a thick skin, but it’s important to me that I’m there to support her. We met in college when she was helping one of my friends in a performance art piece on the quad. My friend had asked me to paint the sidewalks for the project, and one of Ceci’s directions was to run barefoot through the wet paint. Since then, I’ve cut off my dreads and put a hold on the paintings to enter the work force. I have no regrets, and a lot of that is attributed to Ceci and the nonstop pursuit of her dreams.
Some of the photos are simply stunning. Her infectious laughter seeps through the photos to create an echo somewhere between my ears and my brain. She has one tooth that is a little sharper than the others, and it is distinct enough, while “still appealing to most.” She has deep, dark, curly hair that only becomes more fascinating when you hear her talk and realize that she may be one of the funniest people alive. These are the “comedy headshots.”
In the dramatic headshots, she’s wearing a different outfit and all the light from her face is gone. She’s got stunning eyes and high cheekbones that I could trace all day. However, there is one photo that is getting way too much attention.
She stares forward, her lips parted just enough that you can see the bottom edges of her teeth, including the sharp one. Her eyes stare at the lens, seeking to connect with whoever is on the other end. With her hair swooped over to one side, she sort of looks like a dead Lorde. I get the idea behind the pose. It’s supposed to evoke mystery and dark thoughts. We are supposed to be scared by her, but also turned on.
Here’s the problem: to me, that feeling isn’t there. Not with this photo. It’s by far the most popular one in her entire Facebook album, and it’s starting to really get to me. I don’t see it. It’s not working.
This one photo is so clear to me. The pose too forced that it takes away from her real beauty. The “lack of soul” behind her eyes fails, because you can still see it. You see the soul of someone trying to soul-less, and it’s breaking my heart.
For the first time in our relationship, I’m beginning to wonder if she’s going to make it. This photo has planted a seed of doubt in my mind. The doubt that she doesn’t have the talent.
My mind spirals forward to our future and I’m worried that it’s not going to be what either of us have expected.